I decided to feature one of my good friends, Kellye, for this go round. In life you sometimes get the greatest of surprises and becoming friends with Kellye is one of mine. We have a mutual friend, Lisa, that introduced us. Lisa, by the way, is a great friend match maker. I'm not sure how or why Kellye and I clicked so quickly, but we did. I guess it's cause we have similar views on things, similar backgrounds, and we are both wicked sarcastic. Like the kind where you have to say, "Was that too soon?" or "Did I go too far this time?" One of the things I appreciate most about our friendship is she'll call me out on my bullshit, debate with me if she doesn't agree, and we walk away still friends, never angry. At least on my end. For all I know she could have been cursing me up and down to her husband. And I'm ok with that. To sum it up, I think Kel is pretty freaking awesome and I absolutely loved her answers. Side note, she wrote an acceptance speech along with the answers. Gah, she kills me!
I must also note that our husbands get along very well. This is huge because if a husband doesn't like someone, he won't be so willing to hang out with them, which means you won't be so willing to hang out with them. So when everyone gets along we can sit and sing kumbaya together!! Which the four of us have done exactly zero times.
And now let me introduce to you, the one, the only, Kellye Wishard.
1. Please give a quick bio about yourself (your name, husband’s name,
kid’s name/future baby’s nickname and your job, ages welcome but not
I'm Kellye, I like warm baths (But because water in Round Hill, VA is so expensive, a single bath is more than the GDP of most African countries, so I don't take them very often), caffeine in all forms and spending time with friends and family. I've been married to Jason since June 2008. He's 32. I'm a bit of a cougar. I just turned 35 (gasp!), I have a 13 month old girl, Kenley. This June, JB (junebug) will round out the family. We don't know JB's sex yet, but we will in a few days. I've been a SAHM since November. so I've been on both ends of the spectrum of working mom vs SAHM. And if you don't like sarcasm, we probably can't be friends.
2. What is your favorite part about being a momma?
EVERYTHING! But I guess experiencing that all-consuming love that people talk about - that has to be what heroin is like. It's an unparalleled high. (*Editors's note-I promise to warn you if the show Intervention is planning to come to your house!)
3. What is your least favorite?
I sort of hit the baby lottery with Kenley. I have minimal complaints. But maybe the inability to pick up and go whenever, wherever I want is a bit of a drag sometimes. We're schedule people, so making sure she is fed, napping etc is pretty important. We've cut out of many events to get Kenley to bed on time.
4. What is a guilty pleasure of yours?
Trashtastic reality tv. Real Housewives of any city!! (*Another editor's note: check out Bayou Billionaires, Kellye and I were live texting the premiere episode!)
5. Best advice ever given to you?
Go to bed angry. Yes, I said it. Go to bed angry.
6. What advice do you give to new moms?
There's so much to share with new moms, but I guess the most important thing is this: Things will not go according to plan. It won't happen in the hospital and it certainly won't happen at home. Just go with it. It doesn't mean you don't love your kid or that someone else is a better mom than you are. For example, I've seen a few friends really struggle with breast feeding. In full disclosure, I knew that we would be formula folks. It was a complete flip from what I always thought growing up, but it was the decision that worked best for us. I see friends beat themselves up over breastfeeding. The kid suffers, the mom suffers, everyone suffers. If you tried, gave it your best shot and it just didn't work, it's okay. Some women just can't do it. I'm not saying give up as soon as it doesn't work, but there does come a point where you have to wave the white flag. And I hate to see any woman feel like less of a mom because it didn't work out. But what I hate even more is one mother trying to make another feel inferior because of it. You wanna fight me on my decision not to BF, that's cool. You'll lose, but it's okay. But you lay off the mom who tried and couldn't make it work. So that's why I say "Just go with what works for you and your situation. Screw everyone else." That goes for holidays, feeding, sleeping… anything.
7. Favorite memories of your kid?
Well, she's only 13 months, so they all rival each other pretty evenly. Everything is a milestone. But just the other day, as I held Kenley, I was talking to someone else. I was looking to the side. She put her hand on my cheek and turned my head back towards her so she could give me a kiss on the lips. Oh, you want a pony? Done.
8. Favorite memories of you and your husband?
Just last weekend, we were reminiscing about our early days together. We have lots of fun times in the bank. But my all-time favorite memory is this one: Kenley was about 6 months old. I'd just gotten home from work, Kenley and Jason were on the bed playing as I changed out of my work clothes. I came out of the bathroom and joined them on the bed. Jason and I were flanking Kenley. It was five minutes of squeals of delight and laughter coming from all three of us. I took myself out of the moment to realize this is everything I knew I always wanted.
9. What hopes/dreams do you have for your kids?
Too many to put here. I want them to be strong, kind, happy, giving, understanding, funny, smart and a friend to everyone they meet. I want them to be better than me.
10. If you had a day all to yourself, what would you do?
Is it wrong to say "Lay on the couch and watch tv/movies?" I would love to say, I'd go out and meet friends, go to museums, be all adult and cultural. If I had 2 days to myself, maybe that's what I'd do. But with just one… yea, guilt-free laziness. (*Yep, another - LOVE LOVE LOVE this answer!)
11. How did you pick your kid’s name?
Family tradition for me is that girls have the initials KM (Kristina Michele, Kellye Meaghan, Kylie Makenzie), so that was a done deal for a girl. I was torn between Kendall Madison and Katherine Madison. But Jason didn't go for either K name. But he liked Madison. That mattered more to me since it was for my college, JMU. We ended up with Kenley because I found it on the internet, it sounded good with Madison and we both liked it! If JB is a girl, we're breaking that tradition, though. I can't keep Kenley and my niece Kylie straight. Adding another K name will send me over the edge.
12. What activities do you love to do with your family?
Anything that makes all three of us smile. It sounds dumb, but I love to go to Costco with them. Kenley loves the lights and "stuff" to look at. And come on, what adult doesn't love Costco?! And I love taking her to any place with swings because she loves them!
13. If you could go back and tell your pre-mom self something, what would it be?
Drink more now. Hangovers with a kid are so much worse than you can imagine. (*AMEN!)
14. Which celebrity family do you want to be friends with?
Jennifer Garner & Ben Affleck. I feel like they're down to earth, but they also probably have some great Hollywood stories. And if I could be friends with Posh and Becks just so I can see him in person from time to time, that'd be okay, too. But I don't want him to talk, because he's got a girly voice. Just sit there and look pretty, David.
15. What do you admire about your husband's parenting skills?
He loves Kenley with his entire heart. And everything he does is in that spirit. But he's definitely going to be the enforcer in the house, and he's okay with that. Turns out I'm a big ol' softie.
16. Which mom(s) has had a big influence on you?
My own mother has had the biggest influence on me. I hear my mom's words come out of my own mouth 10 times a day. It's so strange. My paternal grandmother and my sister are the supporting influences.
17. Which historical woman do you most want Kenley (and possible
future daughter) to mold herself after? If you have a son, which
There's something admirable in just about any women she comes across. And I want to teach her to look for that. But as for historical figures, I want my girl or girls to look up to strong women like Eleanor Roosevelt, Oprah, Margaret Thatcher, Harriet Tubman, Hilary Clinton, etc. They all stood in the face of convention and changed how future women would be viewed and judged.
As for men… oh my. Can't think of any politicians that I'd want my son to be like because they all claim to be virtuous men but turn out to be hypocritical asshats in their own life. Sorry for the over generalization. There's a book called Heroes for my Son that encapsulates what I'd look for in a hero for my boy. And maybe it's not all that different from what I'm looking for in a hero for a girl.
18. Biggest fear about having two kids?
Logistics. Ugh, there goes my sweaty palms again.
19. Thing you are most looking forward to with having two kids?
Watching them grow up together. I'm nearly 6 years younger than my sister. We're very close now, but couldn't have been less so when we were growing up. So I'm looking forward to seeing what it's like to have kids 18 moths apart.
20. Quick, think of a movie quote, what is it?
"Viva Danang. Danang me, danang me, won't someone get a rope and haaaaaang me?!" That's from Good Morning Vietnam. My sister and I can do that move from beginning to end. Plus I just used that last night at dinner with my dad as he was recounting old Vietnam stories. So that's probably why it's top of mind.
Here is pic of Kellye and her main squeeze, Jason! This, obviously, was from their wedding day. Which I must tell you was one of the hottest days that summer. Man oh man, but it was a FANTASTIC wedding!